Pained
by WriterOfYaoiFics
Summary: Yuusuke+Kurama. Kurama is being used by Yuusuke but what does Yuusuke really think? Will he really choose Kurama over Keiko? Shounen-ai, some language(not much) Read&Review! FINISHED!
1. Used

Pained  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters. If I did, I would... you don't wanna know ^.~  
  
A/N: Yay! My first ficcie here on fanfiction.net. Hopefully someone will like it. It's shounen-ai so do keep that in mind. Review please!!  
  
Pairings: dark Yuusuke+Kurama  
  
As the moon rose and shone into an open window, a solitary figure was outlined. Red hair contrasted brightly against the darkness of the room.  
  
"..." A soft murmur passed from his lips, followed by painful sobs. Body trembling, Kurama curled into a tight ball on his bed, unable to fall asleep. It has become a habit to cry soundlessly while his mother slept. Sometimes Hiei would visit so he kept the window open just in case. Hiei has become a friend who he could turn to, someone who kept him from going off the deep end.  
  
Kurama didn't know how long he could keep on going like this, heart bleeding again and again. He knew he should give up, but he couldn't.  
  
Kurama remembered how he fell in love with his teammate and friend a long while ago, how sweet and torturous it was, but it was nothing compared to this. He loved Yuusuke, there was no denying of it. When in the end, he gathered all his courage and told Yuusuke his deepest secret he had hoped for the best. It was cruel the way Yuusuke laughed at him and said he wasn't worth it. He thought his heart broke that instant, but it broke again when he watched Yuusuke and Keiko marry.  
  
That night when Yuusuke came to his house, stinking with the odor of alcohol, he should have refused to let him in. But no, he had to be the polite and helpful Kurama who still loved Yuusuke. He let Yuusuke stay and when Yuusuke asked for his virginity, he gave it without hesitation. How stupid he had been, thinking that maybe Yuusuke had a place for him in his heart.  
  
From then on, Yuusuke always came to him after a big fight with Keiko. Kurama became his reliever. After a night of sex Yuusuke would return to Keiko and continue with their happy life.  
  
Oh, he had the chance to stop this, but again and again he yielded. His confused mind argued that being with Yuusuke, even under the circumstances, was better than not having him at all.  
  
Once when Kurama accidently whispered "I love you" to Yuusuke during their session, Yuusuke slapped him hard across the face and told him that nobody was to say that except Keiko. He didn't dare to say anything else afterwards.  
  
His heart ached every time he saw the love Yuusuke showed Keiko while for him there was only pain and grimace. To Yuusuke he was something expandable, someone who was there.  
  
Kurama's POV  
  
A gust of wind woke me from my memories, instantly I recognized Hiei. "Kurama..." I could hear the pity in his voice, 'I don't need your pity! I need Yuusuke's love, even if just for a second...' I screamed mentally. I still haven't learned that Yuusuke will never love me; I'm still hoping. So foolish of me...  
  
I leaned into Hiei's embrace as he comforted me. "When will this torture end?" I choked out the words hoarsely, knowing there'll be no reply. "I don't know, Kurama. If you could just say no to him..." Hiei whispered back. 'I know, I know, if I could just stop loving him, but I can't...' And as darkness welcomed me, I prepared my heart for another painful day.  
  
I know this is so sad, but I promise it'll get better in the next chapter. I'm sorry I had to make Yuusuke such a bastard, *ducks a tomato* but he'll get nicer and the story is going to have a happy ending! ^^  
  
See that blue button there near the bottom? If you click on it and write something nice, I'll be very very happy! 


	2. Kidnapped

Disclaimer: For the millionth time, I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters so just leave me alone!!!  
  
A/N: Thank you for reviewing, I luv you guys soooooooooooo much. *hugs each of the reviewers* *all faint due to lack of oxygen* o^^o  
  
lobsterAHOY: Yep, it's going to have a happy ending. I could never make Kurama suffer more than he already did... actually I think he does . ~~ . But don't panic Kurama cause I luv you so I'll make sure Yuusuke rescues you on time ^^  
  
Sita-chan: Yeah, I luv this pairing. Anyways, I think ur fic is great ^.~ Now I have developed an urge to poke things -_-''' *pokes Yuusuke* *stick is burned by reigun* Whew, that was close. Remind me to poke him when he is unconscious and not when he is awake.  
  
Coricomile: Here's some tissues. Yuusuke will get nice don't worry I'll make sure of it *evil laughter*  
  
Megamibara: I'll write more ^^. Actually I have all in my head just need to find time to type it out.  
  
___________  
  
Kurama's POV  
  
Another day, a new beginning. Maybe today Yuusuke will finally see me as something more than just his toy. Iie, it would never happen. Sighing, I lifted my battered body off the bed and prepared for the long day ahead.  
  
About 30 minutes later...  
  
"Good morning Yuusuke" I waved at him. "Hey Kurama" Normal greeting right? Wrong, I can see the scorn in his eyes. I tried to hide my wince. A bit later Hiei and Kuwabara joined us. The day was going pretty well until Keiko appeared. "Keiko! You good today?" Anyone could clearly see the love in his eyes. crack . I think I just heard my heart breaking. I have not noticed that I stopped until the group disappeared from my field of vision. Suddenly a shiver made it down my spine. Weird, it was a warm day and there was no wind. I paid no heed to it until my name was whispered. "Kurama..." It called again. Then I knew, he was here. Karasu. "Well well Kurama, we haven't seen each other in such a long time wouldn't you agree? I bet we have lots to catch up." Trying not to flinch as I felt his breath on my ear I replied as dryly as I managed at the moment. "No, too short actually." "Glad you agree. Let's go Kurama." It was obvious he wanted me to go with him, either willingly or forcefully. I considered the options a bit and decided to let him take me. I had no force to fight him, my soul has been taken by Yuusuke. That was my last thought as a portal opened and I was pulled forward by never ending blackness.  
  
_________  
  
"Where's Kurama?" Hiei suddenly stopped and glanced around with worry. "I dunno but he was here a moment ago." Yuusuke shrugged his shoulders carelessly. "Maybe flower boy decided to go and grow some weird flowers again." Kuwabara added jokingly. Growling softly Hiei tried to pick up Kurama's presence, but he found none. Hiei scanned the area and finally found a trace. "Karasu" he whispered knowing well what Karasu wanted with Kurama. Hiei turned back to the group and dragged Yuusuke into a more secluded area in the forest nearby. "Hiei, what's the big deal?" Hn was the only warning he got before Hiei's fist connected with his jaw. "Ouch, fuck Hiei, what was that for?" Yuusuke glared at Hiei. "For hurting Kurama you bastard. I know that normally you wouldn't do that to your teammate so why?" Yuusuke was quite surprised by the question. "I don't know ok? I'm just confused I guess." Yuusuke dropped his head in his hands to illustrate his point. "Confused enough to make Kurama your sex toy?" Hiei asked crouched on the ground. "No, it's just..." "Just what?" "That maybe I do like Kurama, that he might have a place in my heart, that maybe I don't love Keiko anymore... what else do you want me to say??!!" Yuusuke yelled the last part. "Then if you like him then why torture him?" "Because it scares me, this whole thing." Yuusuke found an interesting spot on the ground near Hiei's feet. He couldn't bring himself to look at Hiei. He knew how wrong he had been, taking advantage of Kurama, but the past is the past and he could do nothing now. "You better figure it out soon. Kurama has been kidnapped by Karasu. Right now you have two choices: to save Kurama and show him you care or to let him die in the hands of Karasu. I suggest you think well." With that said, Hiei turned and walked back to the group. Yuusuke took no notice as he tried to figure out his own heart. Both were so engrossed in the conversation that neither noticed a brown haired girl tiptoeing away minutes ago.  
  
The question has been asked and the answer depended on one person: Yuusuke.  
  
_________  
  
Yay! Two down one to go. Well, what did you think? Anyways, I know it's not very good but I'm short on time here!  
  
See that blue button? Click it, click it, click it, click it, click it........... well, you get the idea ^.~ 


	3. Painfully tortured

disclaimer: I own nothing .  
  
AN: Yay I'm getting reviews!  
  
Antoinette Herrera aka poetisa: Thank you! ^^ I swear you know more about this fic than I do, just to show you what a bad writer I am .. I luv Quoth the Raven's fics too, they're sooo nice ^_^  
  
CrYsTaL_sHaDe: Thank you!!! ^^  
  
lobstersAHOY: Not having internet sucks! Right now I can only use a computer during weekdays! *sniff* Of course everything will be much faster when I get home (I'm visiting in another country right now) I agree that Karasu is a good villain and he's not half bad ^^ maybe I'll write a fic with him and Kurama as lovers. Well... you know what? You convinced me. I'll make this story longer by one or two chapters but that's the best I can do.  
  
Thank you for reviewing, please review again!  
  
************  
  
"What do I do?" Yuusuke murmured to himself. "How am I supposed to know who I really love?"  
  
'You know'  
  
Surprised, Yuusuke eyed his surroundings.  
  
"Who said that?"  
  
'Don't you recognize your own voice?' The voice chuckled.  
  
"I must be going crazy." Yuusuke sank further into the ground.  
  
'Never mind that. You got to go save Kurama.'  
  
"But..."  
  
'But nothing, you and I both know that you love him.'  
  
"What? I didn't..."  
  
'Don't deny it. Remember how you much you think about him? Way more than you think about Keiko. And how aroused you get when he's near you.'  
  
"Shut up!" Yuusuke blushed as he remembered how many cold showers he had to take before being married to Keiko and going to Kurama for comfort. Shuddering he also remembered how cruel he was to Kurama, all the names and the violence.  
  
"He would never forgive me." Yuusuke whispered with a saddened heart.  
  
'Then do something to make up for the times you mistreated him! Like going to rescue him?'  
  
"What about Keiko?" Yuusuke voiced his biggest concern.  
  
'First go rescue Kurama and then try to let her down gently. Kurama's life is at stake here.'  
  
"You're right!" Yuusuke was suddenly brought back to reality. Directing all his anger towards Karasu, he proceeded to find Kurama and rescue him. From somewhere near, Hiei came into view. Smirking he retied his head band. "That gotta do the trick." With that comment he followed Yuusuke quietly. (I don't think he can do that but for the sake of the fic I'm gonna say that he can ^^''')  
  
************  
  
Karasu's place  
  
"C'mon Kurama, isn't this fun?" Karasu chuckled darkly as he admired his own work.  
  
Kurama was tied by the wrists and ankles with strong binds; after all he didn't want Kurama escaping during his fun would he? Kurama was currently half dressed and hanging from the ceiling, swaying a bit.  
  
"Wakey wakey" Karasu whispered as he slapped Kurama awake.  
  
"Umm... wah? Karasu, what did you do to me??!!" Kurama screamed in rage after surveying his condition.  
  
"I didn't do much, the question you should ask is what I'm about to do to you." Karasu smirked mysteriously. "Of course, in times like this one should start by some physical torture and then proceed to emotional torture, wouldn't you agree?"  
  
For some reason unknown to himself Kurama shivered.  
  
From nowhere a rose whip appeared in Karasu's hand. "Will you look what I found when you were unconscious. Ow, that's gotta to hurt." Karasu noted with amusement as he let the rose whip creat lovely red marks all over Kurama's porcelain like skin.  
  
Kurama refused to scream, he wouldn't give this creep the satisfaction, instead he just whimpered.  
  
After god knows how many hours, Kurama lost count after the first, Karasu finally decided to give up. As Karasu observed Kurama again, he was content to see that the kitsune's body had no more unmarred surface except his face.  
  
"Time to continue, Kurama." Eyes shining, Karasu continued his explanation to the half awake Kurama. "You see Kurama, I have been observing you for quite some time now and I have noticed your obssession with your teammate, Yuusuke isn't it? I have to admit that he did a rather good job in torturing you but it wasn't fun since it wasn't me doing it. Then I got thinking, how much would you suffer if you saw Yuusuke slowly dying in front of you? Would you beg me? I think it would be rather entertaining if we found out."  
  
Kurama slowly awakened, pure rage building in his body. Karasu wouldn't dare to do that would he?  
  
"So I'll leave you resting here and I'll be right back with Yuusuke." He turned to go but suddenly an alarm sounded. Opening a screen he looked on with mild interest. "And what would you know? It seems that our friend Yuusuke decided to drop in uninvited."  
  
Kurama was filled with terror; he prayed for Yuusuke to go away.  
  
Despite of Kurama's prayers Yuusuke was determined to find him and rescue him.  
  
Without a word Karasu turned and left; the smirk never disappearing from his face.  
  
************  
  
Moment's later...  
  
Karasu returned with an unconscious Yuusuke. Quickly he noted that Kurama had fallen asleep. He opened a door and tied Yuusuke the same way he had done to Kurama; the two rooms were separated by a huge glass sheet. Kurama and Yuusuke would both be able to see each other yet not able to do anything else. "The show is about to begin."  
  
***********  
  
Umm... weird chapter -_-, I didn't think it would turn out like this but well that's how it came out. Updates might take a while now cause I wan't to start my takedai digimon fic ^^.  
  
*holding a watch* Look at the watch.... you're slowly falling asleep... click on the blue button and review........... 


	4. Emotionally tortured

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters. They belong to someone else.  
  
A/N: I am sorry this took so long, but I do have good reasons! First I had writer's block (curse those things .), then my account got blocked (I have no idea how that happened) and now I am sick, I haven't eaten much for the past two days *sniff* However I managed to write something, aren't I proud ^^  
  
  
  
lobsterAHOY: Of course I read your reviews! Reviews mean so much to me ^^ Of course, constructive flaming is always welcome too. By the way, this fic is going to end in one or two chapters, hope you enjoy this chapter! And thanks for your support ^.~  
  
Antoinette Herrera aka poetisa: Thank you for encouragement *sniff* And you're right the reason I started writing here was to get better ^^ Your plot idea is great and I used it here ^_^ Tell me if I made any errors so I can become better o^.^o. Thank you again!  
  
Warning: This chapter has some language and graphic scene, but only a tiny teeny bit (the graphic scene).  
  
**********  
  
When Yuusuke was rudely awakened, his first instinct was to scream at Keiko to turn off the damn alarm clock. His complaint was stopped short as he noticed *wet* hair clinging to his forehead. Yuusuke managed to stop himself after the first few curses and check out his surroundings; trying his best to ignore the water sliding down his face at the same time.  
  
His breathing stopped when he took in the condition Kurama was in. Unconscious and battered, Kurama looked ready to break; his skin displayed an unnatural purplish color, definitely from heavy beating Yuusuke concluded. Deep crimson blood covered several body parts and stained his torn clothing.  
  
"Enjoying the view?" Karasu's voice sounded from somewhere in the background.  
  
Yuusuke bit back a yelp of surprise, instead he turned towards the source of sound and glared hard.  
  
"Now, now. There's no need to be like this, is there?" Karasu walked out of the shadows with his arms loosely crossed and a smirk on his lips. He stared at Yuusuke like a hunter stalking its prey.  
  
"You FUCKING SON OF A BITCH! What the HELL did you do to Kurama??" Yuusuke screamed at Karasu in a hateful voice.  
  
"Oh, not much. I just had a bit of fun with him like you did. After all, I didn't want to miss out." Karasu replied coldly.  
  
"You're wrong. I know I have done some bad things in the past and hurt Kurama deeply -for which I'm very sorry- but I have never hurt him as much as you did." Yuusuke calmed down and turned serious.  
  
"Are you sure? If my memory is working well, and I assure you it is, you were always drunk or almost drunk when you were with Kurama. Kurama here made sure to cover his bruises so I don't think you've ever taken a good look at your damages to him. Why don't I do you a favor and show you huh?" Karasu leaned against the wall and pressed another button, his eyes never leaving Yuusuke.  
  
A screen scrolled down and lit up automatically showing two forms.  
  
[Yuusuke panted heavily and collapsed against Kurama. Their skin contrasted in the moonlight and the room was filled with a stench of alcohol and sex. Kurama breathed hard but did not go to sleep, instead he flipped Yuusuke over and walked towards the washroom. The mirror in the washroom revealed a tired kitsune. Dark bags rested heavily under his eyes; the shine was gone from his red hair; his body was covered in nail marks, green-purple marks among other signs of physical abuse. Sighing, Kurama cleaned himself up.]  
  
The tape ended there but Yuusuke didn't seem to notice. Karasu was right, he was always drunk and never took a good look at Kurama's bruises, he was no better than Karasu.  
  
"Well? No comments?" Karasu returned to his taunting.  
  
"Maybe I am no better than you but Kurama deserves a chance at happiness. I will kick your sorry ass and let Kurama lead a normal life!" Yuusuke turned to glare again at Karasu.  
  
"No. Take a look at you, I don't think you'll be going anywhere soon. I will have my fun. Let me tell you something, Yuusuke. Despite all the suffering you have put Kurama through, he still loves you -baffling isn't it- and I can't have that. My theory is that his spirit would be crushed if anything would happen to you. We shall soon find out to what extend Kurama would go for his love are you ready?" Karasu's smirk grew.  
  
"FUCK YOU!!" Yuusuke's scowl deepened.  
  
"I'd rather not." Karasu paid no more heed to Yuusuke as he turned his attention to Kurama.  
  
The first thing Kurama registered as he slowly woke up was the unbearable pain. Rolling his eyes Kurama wondered what else was new until he saw Karasu waving at him from across a glass wall. What shocked him the most was the form of an enraged Yuusuke tied up behind Karasu.  
  
As Kurama tried to convince himself that it was just some crazed up nightmare, Karasu already moved on and was currently lashing Yuusuke with the rose whip. Yuusuke's grunts and yelps were amplified by the speakers making Kurama feel as if the whip landed on himself.  
  
"No, Karasu, stop." Kurama begged after the first 10 minutes.  
  
"It's quite easy Kurama, all you have to do is say 'I obey you, master' and do whatever I want." Karasu stopped and turned to look at Kurama.  
  
Kurama's mind took two sides. One told him to drop everything and save Yuusuke and the other told him to never surrender. While this was going on, Yuusuke managed to send some words through.  
  
"Kurama don't -groan- do what he says. I'll -scream- be allright. And I'm sorry -yelp- for what I did to you." Yuusuke managed to finish before letting out a blood curling scream. Karasu was growing impatient, it was only a matter of time when Yuusuke would be beaten to death (A/N: I realize Yuusuke doesn't die so easily but hey it's fanfic right? ^^''').  
  
Kurama winced and soon one of sides took control and he slumped in defeat.  
  
"I obey you, master." Kurama whispered in a monotone.  
  
Everything stopped and the silence took hold. Karasu forgot his torturing and was filled with anticipation; Yuusuke forgot his pain and was filled with utter horror. Both wondered the same thing: Did he...?  
  
"I obey you, master." Kurama said in a louder voice. Karasu smiled and stepped through the door separating the two rooms.  
  
"You will do whatever I say won't you?" Karasu asked, his smile turning into a smirk once again.  
  
Kurama managed a nod.  
  
"Then you wouldn't mind growing some Shimanekisou seeds into this little girl's body?" Karasu smiled darkly. With a short command, a girl of about 7 years old dropped from a trap door overhead. Her big black eyes were filled with unshed tears. She looked from Karasu to Kurama begging silently to be let go. Kurama stared and gulped. How could he ever do this? But if he didn't then Yuusuke would...  
  
"You have one minute to decide Kurama, her or Yuusuke." Karasu watched with intense enjoyment.  
  
***** Cliffhanger! ^.^V What will Kurama do? By the way, don't forget to review! 


	5. Saved at last

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters.  
  
A/N: Well, this story is finally done, I'm so glad ^^. It dragged on forever, I originally had planned to finish this before the end of July and it's now mid-August.  
  
fireice princess: Ehe ^^ People seem to like these torture scenes. I hope you guys do because I loved writing them. Thank you for reviewing!  
  
lobsterAHOY: Thank you for reviewing all my chapters, I'm so happy to have you as a reviewer! I'm glad you talked me into prolonging this because I enjoyed writing the torture bit a lot ^_^ Torturing your favorite characters is so much fun. Oh and I'm sorry for killing Karasu (not on purpose!), I promise to write a KarasuxKurama piece for you. I was thinking of a fluff piece and a lemon but it's so much better to write angst for this pairing, well you'll know when it comes out. I think you really should write something, practice improves everything!  
  
'yada' - Kurama's thoughts "yada" -conversation  
  
********* Kurama stared at the girl in disbelief. 'He doesn't really want me to kill her does he? Has he gone mad? Then again Karasu was never the one to care about innocents.' "Decide quickly my kitsune. You have 50 seconds left" Karasu watched the conflicting emotions in Kurama's eyes with oh so much joy. 'I can't do this. I just can't, but what about Yuusuke? I love Yuusuke, I can't let him die. Yet the girl, she deserves to live, who am I to take her life? What do I do?' Kurama panicked and felt breathless, his emotions crashing and tearing his insides apart. "30 seconds" Karasu announced loving to see Kurama suffer. 'No, don't make me decide! I know that if I kill the girl I wouldn't be able to live with myself but the same goes for Yuusuke.' "10 seconds" 'No, no, no, NO!!! I'm sorry...Yuusuke, I can't kill her like this. I've failed you.' "5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 0. I'm sorry but you just ran out of time Kurama, now you can see your lover die in front of you. Tell me, how does it feel to have someone you love die when you know you could have saved them?" Karasu smirked as he saw guilt clouding Kurama's delicate features.  
  
"No Karasu, the only one running out of time is you." Yuusuke's voice surprised both Karasu and Kurama. "What?" Turning around, Karasu only had time to glare at Yuusuke with murderous eyes before his pained screams were swallowed by Reigun and his body turned to ashes.  
  
"Are you okay Kurama?" Yuusuke quickly jogged over to Kurama and released him from his binds. Kurama's form sagged into Yuusuke's waiting arms. "I've been better." Kurama whispered as he rubbed his head in pain. "I'm sorry for what I did to you Kurama. I know I could never make it up to you and you have every reason to hate me forever but I just want you to know that I - love you." Yuusuke's eyes locked with Kurama's green ones. "Really? You're not lying to me?" Kurama asked in a hopeful tone. Deciding that words just weren't enough Yuusuke inched closer to Kurama's face, his breath mingling with that of the youko's. Slowly, their lips touched gently. Yuusuke ran his tongue over Kurama's bottom lip asking for entrance which Kurama gladly gave. Kurama moaned as their tongues battled each other and he wrapped his arms around Yuusuke's neck, deepening their kiss. "Ahem, are you guys gonna do this all day?" Hiei's annoyed voice jolted the pair out of their kiss. Startled, both turned to look at the fire demon who stood at the end of the room holding the little girl. Kurama blushed an interesting shade of pink and smiled at his friend. "Of course not, let's go home neh?" Kurama looked back at Yuusuke and a genuine smile of happiness touched his lips for the first time in months. "Yeah, let's go home." Yuusuke agreed and scooped Kurama up in his arms. Kurama yelped in surprise and squirmed to get down. "Stay put will ya, I'm still weak you know." Yuusuke laughed softly at Kurama's futile attempts. "That reminds me, weren't you badly beaten?" Kurama stopped squirming and gazed at Yuusuke with curiosity. "Well, Hiei managed to arrive just in time to get me out of the binds and lend me some energy (only thing I can think of now because of lack of knowledge, so please bear with me! ^^'')" Yuusuke told Kurama as he and Hiei started to walk away from the cursed place. "Karasu's gone right?'' Kurama asked once they got out of the building, a haunted look in his eyes. "Yes, he won't be bothering us anytime soon and even if he tries, I'll kick his ass for good!" Yuusuke assured Kurama with a tiny kiss on the forehead and shifted him closer as if he was a precious vase that'll break if one wasn't careful. ----  
  
Kurama's POV  
  
I can't believe how much my life has changed since Karasu's death. Yuusuke divorced with Keiko, who took it all surprisingly well. Yuusuke told me she knew even before the whole Karasu ordeal, something about eavesdropping. I'm quite glad on how everything turned out. Yuusuke and I are happily married with a little girl. Yes, the same little girl whom I almost killed; we named her Hikari in hopes that she would always be happy. Kuwabara and Yukina are engaged much to Hiei's disapproval; Botan and Koenma are dating but the most unexpected couple of all is Hiei and Keiko. Apparently, Keiko turned to Hiei for comfort and fell in love with him.  
  
This is how life's supposed to be: happy.  
  
************* Not the greatest ending or story for that matter but it ended with them living happily ever after. ^_^ Anyways, reviews are always welcome!! 


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